I think I am in the process of finding a way back to blogging consistently. Thanks to the WordPress app on my phone I can now blog one handed.
This very post is brought to you by Faye’s lap nap. One free hand and Im back in the game!
See I am used to being productive in the get stuff done kind of way. Work presentations, school papers, prepping to have 25 people come over to make pizzas at our house.
Now my life looks different. Diapers don’t change themselves. Tears aren’t dried if I don’t pick up the Faye Baby. Little person smiles require interactions initiated by the mom.
And at the end of the day sometimes it doesn’t feel like you’ve actually accomplished anything.
But that’s a lie. A lie I find myself believing sometimes.
See if I paid someone else to do these mom things I would consider those people to be productive every day. I might also consider them saints or angels for all they do for a person who cant verbalize appreciation and sometimes smiles just because they pooped not because you are so obviously amazing at care taking.
In fact, I would always be praying for the people who were constantly interacting with my child. I would tell them daily that I appreciated all the work they put in to tend to my tiny one. I would probably bake them sweet treats and write them love notes.
When someone else does it I think they are amazing. When I do it I find a corner and question my self worth.
I am learning day in and day out that presentations, papers and pizzas aren’t the only measures of productivity. Changed diapers, dried tears and smiles elicited are on my the list of to dos day in and day out. Checking the box next to that list of activities for the day means I’ve been productive.
Everyday Ive produced comfort, safety and happiness for my little bit.
A day will come when I can handle having my to do list expanded. Moments will again exist where I will have time to add writing, working and staging dinner extravaganzas to my plans for the day.
Right now my productive days end with out me being able to explain exactly what I did all day even though every moment felt busy. And that’s ok. It’s good even.
I am pumped that I can use my WordPress app to post more on this blog but even when I don’t use it my days will be productive. And I will try my best to remember that.